This is my uncle, except instead of redneck, he’s Cuban and die-hard GOP. He also hates my part of the family because we caught him, his daughter, and fiancée stealing from my dying grandmother despite him being her caretaker.
He did an amazing job at caring for her while also snatching valuables because he knew he’d have to share when she died.
Some people will tell you that Communism made Cuba a better place. But I suspect a big part of it was all the worst fuckers on the island moving to Florida.
That’s not why they’re the way they are. I’ve expounded on the topic at length before on Lemmy. My family and people are tainted by The Bay of Pigs. They fled Fidel for the US and lost everything they owned in Cuba. That created the bitterness toward Communism and Socialism.
The Bay of Pigs created their hatred for the Dems. The brainwashing was a result of the freedom fighters having their US support removed last minute, leaving them to be killed or jailed. Congress voted to remove support after Kennedy promised it. The brainwashing was around Kennedy doing it intentionally when in reality it was the Republican led Congress and Senate.
They fled Fidel for the US and lost everything they owned in Cuba.
The Bay of Pigs created their hatred for the Dems.
That’s a story I’ve heard. But Dems continued to win Florida through Obama.
Seems like a lot of the Cuban Exile energy came out of their 80s era gray market role in drugs and arms dealing through the Caribbean. And that put them at the forefront of the crypto ponzi schemes under Obama, Trump, and Biden.
Now they’re just bog standard libertarian fascists.
It’s not entirely inaccurate. My great-grandfather was known as The Sugar King. On the other side of the family, my other great granddad worked for PepsiCo LatAm. They made inside deals.
My family were insanely wealthy back in Cuba until they fled here. I can trace my heritage back to the 1300s and before on that side of the family. My maternal namesake ancestor was the first mayor/alcalde of Habana and received his name “Sotolongo” from King Ferdinand & Isabella. There is a town named after him north of the Portuguese border.
The 70s and 80s produced the Peter Pan and the Mariel boat lifts where Castro released his worst criminals and people from insane asylums to flee here and elsewhere. It was all fucked.
probably doesnt help that most of their first/only experience with the US is florida, southern florida at that. far as scammer culture goes, it probably doesn’t get much worse in the US than florida (maybe equal to boston/NYC/silicon valley?)
100%. I left Florida in 99. Returned briefly in 2004 and left for good in 2009. I happen to be here visiting my parents now. Thankfully they live in the Florida Keys.
Reminiscent of my uncle and his care for/leeching of my grandmother, except check this out.
Last time I saw him we were talking he told me “I am racist, but know racism is wrong, and I’m trying my best to teach my kids not to be like that”
Which is super self aware; so good for you? But I just can’t wrap my mind around how you can know racism is wrong and yet continue to be racist and struggle to teach your kids to not be racist. Like…just stop being racist?
As someone who was raised in a rather racist in-group, I can say that it took a really long time to purposefilly unlearn the automatic gut responses my father ingrained into me. I would, for several years, think or say something without considering it, and immediately realize what I had just said. Actions and attitudes are often automatic, especially when taught for a long time. I can certainly see where the uncle’s coming from, because I’d imagine that the only reason I’ve been able to mostly get through it is because I got away from that situation when I went to college, rather than later in life.
There’s a strange duality of living or coming from the South in the US, and presumably, other places with extreme prejudice. Words or phrases get used like water such that they are etched into your mind, causing an almost Pavlovian response mechanism to trigger, despite one’s true feelings.
It’s almost like a game Red light, Green light, but for awfulness. I haven’t lived in the South for decades, and on occasion, a hateful word will pop out of a dark hole in my head even though my real thoughts and actions run counter to it.
I can sort of understand his stance, but being aware of it is enough, at least to me, to fix it. Anything other than that is intentional malice.
I think I have pity for him being racist and not wanting to be, but I am confused. He can’t help the thoughts that go through his head, if that’s what he means, but I don’t know if he is also acting on those thoughts. If he is, then yeah, just stop, lol.
Except it’s not so simple. Research consistently shows that even people who believe themselves not to be prejudiced act differently based on prejudice. Having a “black” name, BIPOC, a woman, disabled, or any other “minority” affects actions and attitudes subliminally.
Who do you ask a question to (the person pushing the wheelchair, or the person in the wheelchair?), sit next to on public transit (the black guy or the white woman?), friend’s teenager you ask to babysit/house-sit (the white girl or the black guy?), hire to do your gardening (the Hispanic man or the black woman?), question do you take first after your work presentation (white man or Indigenous woman?), smile at politely as you pass on the street (the unhoused?), etc.
For someone who acknowledges they are racist, these biases run deep, and I imagine it must be mentally taxing to constantly run a filter on your actions you notice, let alone all your unconscious/automatic reactions.
As someone who’s a “woke” anti-racist, I find it challenging to even notice my biases, let alone change my actions. (When’s the last time you made eye contact and smiled at an unhoused person automatically, without noticing you’re doing it? I do so, but it’s a conscious action for me, not automatic.)
I don’t disagree, but it’s like asking a woman who she would rather be alone with, an unknown man or an unknown woman. There’s also familiarity bias and having more in common. I don’t think I have to be racist or prejudice to know there will in general be less friction with a white dude vs a black dude, because that’s just most people around me. I still try and ignore that because I know it’s limiting my experiences, but there are good reasons that I wouldn’t ascribe purely to prejudice.
Also for the wheelchair example, I again think there are reasons for this. For the person in the wheelchair you often don’t know why, did they have a stroke and can’t speak? Are they ill? Or did they just hurt their leg? I’m not saying people wouldn’t be biased against the disabled even if that weren’t true, but a lot of these have legitimate reasons that aren’t just prejudice (maybe the dictionary definition but not irrational prejudice).
Who do you ask a question to (the person pushing the wheelchair, or the person in the wheelchair?),
-> depends on why they sit in a wheelchair and what I want to ask.
sit next to on public transit (the black guy or the white woman?)
-> I mostly stand but again, if I had to sit, it depends on the vibe I am getting from both, with - vibe considered equal - a tendency to sit near a guy to not make a woman feel uncomfortable.
, friend’s teenager you ask to babysit/house-sit (the white girl or the black guy?),
-> if color of skin or gender enter my considerations, I would let neither anywhere near a child, as I obviously do not know them nearly well enough.
hire to do your gardening (the Hispanic man or the black woman?)
-> I will not pay someone to do chores for me, doing everyday chores is what keeps people grounded. I don’t want to risk becoming something like a boomer.
, question do you take first after your work presentation (white man or Indigenous woman?),
-> whoever signaled a question first
smile at politely as you pass on the street (the unhoused?)
-> everyone that makes eye contact
-> holy shit you made that list of examples sound like it’s in any way difficult to know exactly how to behave.
Ok say you had to let someone watch your dog or it will starve or get very sick from overeating and all your friends/family/acquaintances are out of town, and there was a medical emergency that the ambulance is just about ready to leave, and you were wearing headphones so you didn’t notice anything was wrong until the people in the ambulance walked in through the door someone else had opened for them. You have 10 seconds before the ambulance leaves with your loved one, and have to decide from 2 onlookers. One person is white and one is black. That is the only difference you can gather as you are quickly walking by, and you don’t have time to get a good look at either of them. You can only choose one because your landlord’s policy only allows you to have 1 person who isn’t you have a key to your apartment. Which do you choose?
This is my uncle, except instead of redneck, he’s Cuban and die-hard GOP. He also hates my part of the family because we caught him, his daughter, and fiancée stealing from my dying grandmother despite him being her caretaker.
He did an amazing job at caring for her while also snatching valuables because he knew he’d have to share when she died.
Some people will tell you that Communism made Cuba a better place. But I suspect a big part of it was all the worst fuckers on the island moving to Florida.
That’s not why they’re the way they are. I’ve expounded on the topic at length before on Lemmy. My family and people are tainted by The Bay of Pigs. They fled Fidel for the US and lost everything they owned in Cuba. That created the bitterness toward Communism and Socialism.
The Bay of Pigs created their hatred for the Dems. The brainwashing was a result of the freedom fighters having their US support removed last minute, leaving them to be killed or jailed. Congress voted to remove support after Kennedy promised it. The brainwashing was around Kennedy doing it intentionally when in reality it was the Republican led Congress and Senate.
That’s a story I’ve heard. But Dems continued to win Florida through Obama.
Seems like a lot of the Cuban Exile energy came out of their 80s era gray market role in drugs and arms dealing through the Caribbean. And that put them at the forefront of the crypto ponzi schemes under Obama, Trump, and Biden.
Now they’re just bog standard libertarian fascists.
It’s not entirely inaccurate. My great-grandfather was known as The Sugar King. On the other side of the family, my other great granddad worked for PepsiCo LatAm. They made inside deals.
My family were insanely wealthy back in Cuba until they fled here. I can trace my heritage back to the 1300s and before on that side of the family. My maternal namesake ancestor was the first mayor/alcalde of Habana and received his name “Sotolongo” from King Ferdinand & Isabella. There is a town named after him north of the Portuguese border.
The 70s and 80s produced the Peter Pan and the Mariel boat lifts where Castro released his worst criminals and people from insane asylums to flee here and elsewhere. It was all fucked.
probably doesnt help that most of their first/only experience with the US is florida, southern florida at that. far as scammer culture goes, it probably doesn’t get much worse in the US than florida (maybe equal to boston/NYC/silicon valley?)
100%. I left Florida in 99. Returned briefly in 2004 and left for good in 2009. I happen to be here visiting my parents now. Thankfully they live in the Florida Keys.
I hate this state.
Communism was the mean which it happened
Reminiscent of my uncle and his care for/leeching of my grandmother, except check this out.
Last time I saw him we were talking he told me “I am racist, but know racism is wrong, and I’m trying my best to teach my kids not to be like that”
Which is super self aware; so good for you? But I just can’t wrap my mind around how you can know racism is wrong and yet continue to be racist and struggle to teach your kids to not be racist. Like…just stop being racist?
As someone who was raised in a rather racist in-group, I can say that it took a really long time to purposefilly unlearn the automatic gut responses my father ingrained into me. I would, for several years, think or say something without considering it, and immediately realize what I had just said. Actions and attitudes are often automatic, especially when taught for a long time. I can certainly see where the uncle’s coming from, because I’d imagine that the only reason I’ve been able to mostly get through it is because I got away from that situation when I went to college, rather than later in life.
There’s a strange duality of living or coming from the South in the US, and presumably, other places with extreme prejudice. Words or phrases get used like water such that they are etched into your mind, causing an almost Pavlovian response mechanism to trigger, despite one’s true feelings.
It’s almost like a game Red light, Green light, but for awfulness. I haven’t lived in the South for decades, and on occasion, a hateful word will pop out of a dark hole in my head even though my real thoughts and actions run counter to it.
I can sort of understand his stance, but being aware of it is enough, at least to me, to fix it. Anything other than that is intentional malice.
I think I have pity for him being racist and not wanting to be, but I am confused. He can’t help the thoughts that go through his head, if that’s what he means, but I don’t know if he is also acting on those thoughts. If he is, then yeah, just stop, lol.
Except it’s not so simple. Research consistently shows that even people who believe themselves not to be prejudiced act differently based on prejudice. Having a “black” name, BIPOC, a woman, disabled, or any other “minority” affects actions and attitudes subliminally.
Who do you ask a question to (the person pushing the wheelchair, or the person in the wheelchair?), sit next to on public transit (the black guy or the white woman?), friend’s teenager you ask to babysit/house-sit (the white girl or the black guy?), hire to do your gardening (the Hispanic man or the black woman?), question do you take first after your work presentation (white man or Indigenous woman?), smile at politely as you pass on the street (the unhoused?), etc.
For someone who acknowledges they are racist, these biases run deep, and I imagine it must be mentally taxing to constantly run a filter on your actions you notice, let alone all your unconscious/automatic reactions.
As someone who’s a “woke” anti-racist, I find it challenging to even notice my biases, let alone change my actions. (When’s the last time you made eye contact and smiled at an unhoused person automatically, without noticing you’re doing it? I do so, but it’s a conscious action for me, not automatic.)
I don’t disagree, but it’s like asking a woman who she would rather be alone with, an unknown man or an unknown woman. There’s also familiarity bias and having more in common. I don’t think I have to be racist or prejudice to know there will in general be less friction with a white dude vs a black dude, because that’s just most people around me. I still try and ignore that because I know it’s limiting my experiences, but there are good reasons that I wouldn’t ascribe purely to prejudice.
Also for the wheelchair example, I again think there are reasons for this. For the person in the wheelchair you often don’t know why, did they have a stroke and can’t speak? Are they ill? Or did they just hurt their leg? I’m not saying people wouldn’t be biased against the disabled even if that weren’t true, but a lot of these have legitimate reasons that aren’t just prejudice (maybe the dictionary definition but not irrational prejudice).
Who do you ask a question to (the person pushing the wheelchair, or the person in the wheelchair?),
-> depends on why they sit in a wheelchair and what I want to ask.
sit next to on public transit (the black guy or the white woman?)
-> I mostly stand but again, if I had to sit, it depends on the vibe I am getting from both, with - vibe considered equal - a tendency to sit near a guy to not make a woman feel uncomfortable.
, friend’s teenager you ask to babysit/house-sit (the white girl or the black guy?),
-> if color of skin or gender enter my considerations, I would let neither anywhere near a child, as I obviously do not know them nearly well enough.
hire to do your gardening (the Hispanic man or the black woman?)
-> I will not pay someone to do chores for me, doing everyday chores is what keeps people grounded. I don’t want to risk becoming something like a boomer.
, question do you take first after your work presentation (white man or Indigenous woman?),
-> whoever signaled a question first
smile at politely as you pass on the street (the unhoused?)
-> everyone that makes eye contact
-> holy shit you made that list of examples sound like it’s in any way difficult to know exactly how to behave.
Ok say you had to let someone watch your dog or it will starve or get very sick from overeating and all your friends/family/acquaintances are out of town, and there was a medical emergency that the ambulance is just about ready to leave, and you were wearing headphones so you didn’t notice anything was wrong until the people in the ambulance walked in through the door someone else had opened for them. You have 10 seconds before the ambulance leaves with your loved one, and have to decide from 2 onlookers. One person is white and one is black. That is the only difference you can gather as you are quickly walking by, and you don’t have time to get a good look at either of them. You can only choose one because your landlord’s policy only allows you to have 1 person who isn’t you have a key to your apartment. Which do you choose?