• NKBTN@feddit.uk
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    9 hours ago

    Genuine question here, am not trying to be edgy or controversial: Which would you least like to happen - be raped, or lose the use of a limb in a road accident?

    As a cishet man, I’d take the former (assuming no HIV etc)

    • eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      54 minutes ago

      Have you been sexually assaulted?

      If not, consider that it can FUCK YOU UP mentally and is not over for the victim when your rapist zips up and walks away into the embrace of societal protection.

      • NKBTN@feddit.uk
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        24 minutes ago

        I have not, and I’ve got the privilege that I can walk the streets at night without the fear of it even crossing my mind.

        I do have a vague fear of getting mugged or beaten up, and even the threat of the latter played on my mind almost daily for about a year after it happened, so I’d imagine it (or SA) actually happening to me would last a fair bit longer and the intrusive memories be even more intensely horrible

    • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net
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      4 hours ago

      “(assuming no HIV etc)”

      That’s not a safe assumption though, and the dread of waiting to find out whether you’ve been infected with something awful is a part of why rape is so traumatising. It can take weeks for tests to come back.

      • NKBTN@feddit.uk
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        2 hours ago

        Of course not - this is very much hypothetical. I’m more interested in whether people think emotional/psychological trauma would be worse than lifelong physical trauma

        • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net
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          2 hours ago

          My point is that the whole psychological Vs physical trauma question is a false dichotomy when we’re talking about sexual assault. Rape can and often does leave a person with lifelong physical trauma

    • Banana@sh.itjust.works
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      4 hours ago

      I don’t think that’s really a fair question especially since a vehicle accident is just that: an accident. Being raped is horrifying partially because it’s someone’s choice to do that to you.

      Would I prefer to be accidentally injured over being intentionally traumatized and possibly also injured? Yeah, probably.

      Additionally, i dont think my main point is clear but ill clarify: I really don’t think people deserve criticism about being afraid when they’re just taking reasonable precautions. Especially in a society that is just not likely to hold a man accountable for sexual misconduct.

    • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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      9 hours ago

      A more comparable question is would you rather lose the use of a limb from an accident or have to go under vaginal reconstruction to restore use of urinary function after rape.

      I know which is more traumatic. People act like being raped comes with no consequences.

      • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net
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        1 hour ago

        Yup. A friend of mine almost died last year from bladder complications that ultimately stem from being assaulted almost 20 years ago.

        To an external observer, rape may not seem likely to leave lasting physical trauma, but that’s because the injuries aren’t as likely to be visible, or things that peopl feel comfortable speaking about openly (plus society has a bad track record on how it treats survivors of SA)