I was recently having a discussion with my girlfriend on why i feel this exact way. I was having alot of trouble putting into words what about it is so off putting to me. she accused me of kink shaming them, and I dont disagree with that assessment. But i was struggling to express WHY? I find the whole culture surrounding it disgusting. Weirdly it has nothing to do with the obvious infections and diseases associated with casual sex, and obviously people can do whatever they want in the privacy of their own homes. I generally take no issue with anything ‘odd’ in the bedroom. Theres just something off about the culture as a whole that sounds all the alarm bells in my brain.

Maybe someone can put into words what this feeling is and where its coming from?

Louis Rossman had a video years ago that really got me looking at people differently. An obvious sign for him is how they treat animals. animals sadly are often the ultimate litmus test for ones morality. I find that respecting an animal, its boundries and its emotions is a thing only possible when youve developed a (imo) basic sense of empathy, that for pets and animals cant be expressed verbally.

Think of times when a person was trying to force an animals to behave in a particular way purely for self intrest. Or if someone you know outright denies the complex emotions of animals. I am by no means an animal rights activist and i often can be heard yelling at my dog to stop barking or etc. But i think even if we “own” them most good people dont think of pets as propperty, status symbols, or entertainment.

the moment i see behavior like this I try to correct and if they actively fight me on it or make no attempt to improve. I will disconnect from them entirely, not worth it. If thats how you treat family, i dont want to see how you treat friends.

Not you again… genuinely convinced this user is a bot. He made this same argument a month ago on a now deleted post almost verbatim. I disputed his claims with evidence and they continuously moved the goalpost through the entire argument. either braindead or just software please ignore.

Lets say your worst fears are correct and this “female”, is trying to keep you as an orbiter. Get over yourself, you had no claim to her time.

She was willing to spend time with you before, probably because she thought you were genuinely interested in her platonically and wanted you as a close friend. You caught feelings and are blaming her for her actions and assigning motives to easily explainable actions. you crossed the line, and she pulled away. Shes a social person and wanted many friends. Even if she was interested in you at some point, you said/did something that superseded that. Maybe she felt like you werent reaching out to her enough. but my guess is using the word female unironically to describe a person.

Seems to me that she “Intended” to hop online, play some games and talk to strangers. You should probably back off and re-evaluate how you view people especially women.

Open Book by: Cake https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=YUkLbsc6434

Heres a song, very relevant to your situation.

Yeah! great read if you have the time. It can be used to explain alot of things since its a very open take on going from a state of ignorance or naivety to “seeing the light”. I think its an important read, since people still in the “cave” are hard if not impossible to “convince” with such a limited perspective on reality.

I further interpret this to mean If we want to pull our fellow man out of the cave, we have to help change their perspective and meet them where they are in their journey out.

“The allegory of the cave” Is another great example!

Meow

translation

This is the pond. Its a nice pond. Moving on.

Interested if you have an article or video you are referencing here, would love to read/watch

Probably, but im more concerned with archiving the years of information being poured into the platform.

I tried voyager, Its missing post viewing modes that I loved from boost and baconreader. I do not tolerate ads that is slander lol, I did a 1x payment to support the devs and now dont get any ads, If they update voyager with the features i need, Ill do the same.

I feel that i fully aknowlaged the selfishness of my actions in terms of the value I bring to society. I simply disagree with the idea that this is for everyone. There have always been outliers or introverts, and they will and have provided value where they can, even If, like you said, its not actually productive to the average experience of the everyday person(like your farm example). Even so I do believe people can do great things from the relative Isolation of their peers. A book for example could radicalize millions.

I will admit that resisting opression by communicating thoughts and ideas with others is paramount, and me and others like me are possibly doing a disservice to the rest of our communities by not being present. But as long as the “isolation” is not a coping mechanism, I don’t see an issue. Sure interaction like this is surface level but to say its unhealthy… Ill agree that too much of this Is unhealthy, but that applies to almost everything. With anything that effects your brain, its all about your relationship with that substace or action not just the substance or action itself.

To me, its as if you view introversion as a mental illness rather than a personality type or lifestyle. Please correct me if im wrong.

Im glad thats working for you and I hope that someone reads this and gets value out of it. but no offense I think we just live entirely different lifestyles and value different things.

I will agree that your lifestyle is definitely healthier for the community at large, and politically speaking your local area is healthier having you and others socializing about or engaging with current events.

I think outliers like myself must exist in some way. While nothing I produce currently is on the same level as lets say an artist or musician. Someday I will write, program, or even just share something ive made that gives me the value and purpose I seek.

Selfish? probably, but I am constantly learning about new things and perspectives. Lemmy just happens to be a highway into other peoples minds that I very much enjoy. I did not mean to imply that I desire the same level of social belonging that others have. Ive got my family, animals, significant other, all of my remaining energy belongs to them.

Heck maybe im an asshole and youre about to slap me with a truth bomb, and thats why im here.

What happened? Did the original mods protest and reddit itself just make a new one? I know there were alot of communities that shut down for a day or two when the API changes happened.

I think it really boils down to the owners of the servers doing the right thing. I mean that in terms of properly organizing the important information on their server and archiving it elsewhere simulateously.

Otherwise yeah I agree its just a furnace In which data is being shoveled into, Rather than a single event as I implied.

Again, someone knowlegable please tell me we are wrong, and a solution exists, or is in development.

I wonder if discord shuts down due to lets say its predator problem, will this be a library of alexandria type event? Obviously wed attempt to grab as much as we can before the “library” burns down, but how? To my understanding every server owner would have to install a bot to grab all of that data themselves.

Someone please tell me im wrong and why because I hate this.

True, Generally I meet people though hyper-specific hobbies like fighting games or MTG. All of which have a pretty sizable upfront cost to enjoy. Not to mention the events are usually at a store, restaraunt, venue etc. All of which costs money. Im finding it harder and harder to justify financially and I cant imagine its much better for anyone else.

Openly? Banned.

Same! Boost Is definitely the best ive found. Even the free version is incredible the ads only apear in a tiny box at the bottom in the comments section. Super unintrusive, I supported Immediately after testing out other options and landing back on boost.

I just wish they could somehow implement saving posts and going back through upvoted content similar to how it worked on reddit, but i understand that there are probably technical limitations and less financial insentive.

I feel kind of bad though everyone should feel this sense of community.

oh, stop it you <3. In all seriousness though this whole post’s comment section Is just proof of what im saying. Gotta spread that love around Im just saying what we all kind of silently agree on.