I like and respect teachers, but I’m a software developer and I’m telling you that adding extra parenthesis often adds clarity and makes the whole process smoother. You exist in a whole other context that has norms and assumptions that do not apply to what I’m talking about.
You being technically correct is irrelevant.
Adults who have forgotten the rules who I work with and read/write code where it’s important. In the real world.
This is like some pure maths vs real life engineering cliché.
You’re either being deliberately obtuse or you’re painfully naive.
That’s because it’s already clear as is, as per the rules of Maths.
More people evaluate 2+3x4 incorrectly than 2+(3x4). So, no, your answer does not hold up to my observed reality. You can throw as many “well technically” and “well actually” as you want, but that’s not going to fix the bug or make a pr.
Used hinge. It’s the least bad, as of this year anyway.
Most people who use dating apps are, frankly, bad at it. People send garbage messages with garbage profiles. People half-ass it and expect the other folks to carry the whole thing. I feel like I could write a short book on how to do it better.
Condensed into like three bullet points it’s
Being “an introvert” doesn’t excuse you from being present and engaged. The other person isn’t going to be that interested in someone who responds every couple hours with “lol”. If you can’t muster up the energy to have a real conversation, you aren’t ready to date.
Out-groups to bind, in-groups to protect. That’s it. Often on a purely emotional level. Having the out-group be just out and about living life feels wrong to that kind of person. There has to be hierarchy, they feel.
Part of that falls under the “don’t show up when invited” umbrella, but mostly that sucks. I’m sorry you feel like your efforts and friendship efforts weren’t appreciated.
I’ve definitely had a couple friends (“friends”) that were lopsided. I remember posting about one way back in the 2000s on some web forum, and a guy with a otter(?) avatar told me “This guy, that flakes on your plans and only shows up when it works for him? He doesn’t respect you. Don’t put up with that”. Good advice from a small furry animal, I think.
Some people just aren’t worth it. Maybe they were in the past. Maybe they will be again. But I find it’s important to have boundaries for oneself. It can be hard to balance.
A lot of our behaviors and coping mechanisms come from our parents. So if they’re lonely and have no friends, you should examine why that is, and try to change it in yourself.
One of my friends realized after therapy they had a lot of behaviors from their dad. Stuff they hated when their dad did (lashing out when uncomfortable, mostly). Once they saw it, they were able to work on it. Before that, it had been a real source of friction with friendships.
Hah, a different ex that I’m still friends with responded with “you rank us??”
No, there’s not a full ranking. I’m still good friends with 2, there’s a lot of ones I have no hard feelings about, and then there’s this one stinker.
The other day I had to use a browser without any plugins to go to a site, and it was unrecognizable with all the ads. When I normally visit it’s clean and simple. These ads pushed content under the fold. Horrible.
“go home and look at Instagram” is largely a stand-in for “I’m tired and can’t muster the energy to do anything that feels more effortful”.
In my limited experience, the trick to getting out of the hole is doing the hard thing anyway. That and professional advice and medication as appropriate. You can’t to my knowledge willpower your way out of clinical depression. But ultimately if you want out of the hole, you have to climb out, regardless if that means therapy, medication, or being mildly uncomfortable. It’s not going to fix itself.
I usually recommend Meetup or similar. There’s a bunch that are just get togethers for board games or whatnot.
But you have to keep going. I think people expect to like go once and make a new best friend and partner. You usually need a lot of interactions to level up from “stranger” to “person I see sometimes” to friend.
I also ran a small meetup for a while before the pandemic. Made a few friends that way, but it’s a lot of thankless work.
I comment. Reminds me of how I’d end up playing medic in tfc/tf2- someone has to do it.
I don’t post original stuff often, though.
They vote for their material interests in the same sense that a man walking at night with sunglasses picks the best path. He thinks it’s obvious but he really needs to take the sunglasses off and maybe get a flashlight. He’s walking a stupid path and will probably fall into a ditch.
Fox News is probably the sunglasses in this metaphor.
I feel like a lot of people who bemoan the lack of friends also don’t invest in friendship. Don’t show up when invited, don’t organize anything themselves.
I used to run a book club and a board game club, and it was always kind of a struggle to get people to show up. The pull of “just go home and look at Instagram” is strong, I guess.
Many years ago I had to explain to a coworker how progressive taxation works. He was like “that’s a great idea! We should do that! It’s stupid that now your pay goes up but you take home less because you get taxed more”
I had to tell him, yes it is a good idea. It’s how it works now. You don’t get more pay and suddenly your whole income is taxed more.
He’d had no idea
I did a lot of stupid stuff as a teenager but most of it is forgotten.
Someone tricked me into stealing my unique gloves in diablo2 once. Felt real stupid after but they just blocked me and I never saw them again. (I think it was that if you die when the item was being moved it drops onto the ground, so they told me to swap my gloves in a pvp fight and then killed me)
I had an ex partner get upset because I used a period at the end of an innocuous text. This is among the reasons why they are my least favorite ex. Just a mess of anxiety and arrogance, where they’d worry about bullshit but be completely convinced that they were right and their way of thinking about things was the only sensible way.
Unfortunately they’re still distantly connected to the friend group, but luckily I haven’t run into them in years.
I’ve seen some garbage slide through code reviews. Most people don’t do them well.
I’m doing contract work at a big multinational company, and I saw a syntax error slide through code review the other day. Just, like, too many parenthesis, the function literally wouldn’t work. (No, they don’t have automated unit tests or CI/CD. Yes, that’s insane. No, I don’t have any power to fix that, but I am trying anyway). It’s not hard to imagine something more subtle like a memory leak getting through.
In my experience, people don’t want to say “I think this is all a bad idea” if you have a large code review. A couple years ago, a guy went off and wrote a whole DSL for a task. Technically, it’s pretty impressive. It was, however, in my opinion, wholly unnecessary for the task at hand. I objected to this and suggested we stick with the serviceable, supported, and interoperable approach we had. The team decided to just move forward with his solution, because he’d spent time on it and it was ready to go. So I can definitely see a bunch of people not wanting to make waves and just signing off on something big.
it’s the tens of millions of people who actively and aggressively support full-blown fascism
Since I don’t routinely hang around with stupid people, it’s easy to forget how profoundly stupid so many people are. Not just that they don’t know stuff, even though that’s a big factor as well. Just their ability to reason is toddler level. Like patrick in that meme with the wallet.
You’re not listening to me and I don’t think you’re worth listening to. Go away. Goodbye.