I’m new to Lemmy. I came across join-lemmy.org and browsed the servers by “most active.” Blåhaj stood out to me because of its cute logo. I’m a straight cis girl, but I love the LGBT community, and being an escort I’ve met many trans girls (and some gay guys) through my work, so I’ll always stand in full solidarity with them. I also noticed that the instance has downvotes disabled, which made it feel like the right place for me, lol. Curious how it went for you all.
I’d seen a lot of posts from blahaj’s admin, @Ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone, and I really liked her admin/moderating philosophy (particularly this post, which I have bookmarked it’s so good), and it was also where the big /c/196 community was. I don’t like having to deal with a whole subset of online people, and Ada does a really bangup job of banning those kind of troublesome people before I ever even see them or have to interact with them. My personal blocklist is almost empty, because Ada does such a good job of preventing me from having to interact with those people. Anyway, thanks for all the hard great work, Ada! You make my Lemmy experience so much more pleasant!
I don’t know what neopronouns are, but I agree with what they said. I agree with the commenter who said they/them is the default until corrected or you see it in their user flair.
the promoun discussion blew up on that community because of a user that many accused of being a troll.
they (drag) said that they(drag) had no personal pronouns and should be referred to as dragon (technically they [drag] wanted to be called dragonrider because their [drag’s] partner was a dragon.) this meant that saying words like “you” or “they” or “your” was incorrect. to address them (drag) one would need to talk like “what is drag’s opinion on dragselve’s pronouns?”. instead of “what are your pronouns?”
i genuinely can’t tell if they’re (drag is) a troll, i just think that’s too much to ask of people. it’s legitimately hard to talk without using personal pronouns at all. that said, I’ll still try when addressing drag or anyone else. i just think drag is setting dragself up for disappointment if that’s how drag wants others to address drag.
i can’t get the ada post to open right now, and can’t actually remember what their final stance was. i just remember when that all blew up. i had no real skin in the game, it wasn’t terribly relevant or important to me, but i did try to talk it through with drag and see if i could understand it all better. the conclusion i came to was that drag and i should probably just hang in different circles haha. you don’t have to get on well with everyone. I’m not trans or anything like that. my opinions shouldn’t matter for the rules of trans focused community. i just found the whole situation interesting to see unfold.
(case and point: i just went through to try and re-proofread this to make sure i didn’t misgrender drag and realized that i still had on my 4th sweep. then i realized that to change all of the personal pronouns in this comment that should be drag into drag would make it unreadable to anyone who doesn’t already know the situation. i put those in brackets to maintain readability)