I hated the games. When the commitment wasn’t there, I always felt like I was acting a certain way just to make my current girlfriend stay around. When I got married, the games stopped. Also, regular sex, not worrying about STDs, someone who was there to talk to all the time, someone to do things with, and someone to share expenses was a great relief. Don’t get me wrong, there were still plenty of rough times, but we’d made a commitment and I knew she’d stick around until we worked things out.
I always felt like I was acting a certain way just to make my current girlfriend stay around.
That is so sad that you felt that way. I never catered to anyone just to keep them around, and I hope you can learn to do so, too (like, actually doing so, not just avoiding romance entirely as a bypass).
Can’t speak for them, but it increased my confidence and reduced my depression. But I’ve been married twice and the first one was very much not this. It has to do with the right relationship, not just being in one.
Respectfully, I don’t see anything in your comment correlating how you feel to the marriage vs the general relationship. Do you feel there is a difference?
What I was trying to convey was that being married to the wrong person left me depressed and feeling like a failure. It wasn’t the marriage, it was being with the right person.
Can you tell me more about that, if you don’t mind?
I hated the games. When the commitment wasn’t there, I always felt like I was acting a certain way just to make my current girlfriend stay around. When I got married, the games stopped. Also, regular sex, not worrying about STDs, someone who was there to talk to all the time, someone to do things with, and someone to share expenses was a great relief. Don’t get me wrong, there were still plenty of rough times, but we’d made a commitment and I knew she’d stick around until we worked things out.
That is so sad that you felt that way. I never catered to anyone just to keep them around, and I hope you can learn to do so, too (like, actually doing so, not just avoiding romance entirely as a bypass).
Tbh, I was a bit of a jerk. I wouldn’t have wanted to be around me if I acted “natural.”
When the only options are players of the game, it may not be by choice.
Can’t speak for them, but it increased my confidence and reduced my depression. But I’ve been married twice and the first one was very much not this. It has to do with the right relationship, not just being in one.
Respectfully, I don’t see anything in your comment correlating how you feel to the marriage vs the general relationship. Do you feel there is a difference?
What I was trying to convey was that being married to the wrong person left me depressed and feeling like a failure. It wasn’t the marriage, it was being with the right person.