This post is for seeking some advice on what’s the best route to try to help some friends get some of their offline lives back.
This year, a large percent of my friend group from my hometown have stopped interacting much with anyone outside of immediate family such as parents and work. Very noticeable for those that are under 30 (I’m 30) compared to those a few years older than me. For 3 of them that were pretty close, they still send memes and Instagram reels all day almost daily but never respond to any messages nor send any anymore. The only way to get them to do anything is to show up semi unannounced with tickets to go somewhere or with food to get them out of the endless scroll, and even then 2 of them will still scroll no matter what’s going on around them, even while driving.
Seeing the reels that get shared since the summer, nearly all of them are AI or extreme (not political, moreso like extreme overeating, extreme overpriced buying/unboxing videos or people fighting past what mma/ufc would allow type content). This seems to have led a few to being scared of the outside while a few others consider outside to be too boring now. When we do hang out I notice my algorithm is completely different than theirs with every reel scroll. We were all very tech focused coming our of school but I’m 1 of 2 that didn’t make it into a long term career, a couple of them have been on the AI hype train for a few years now.
Does this seem to be an ongoing trend for you? I know some people here have made mention over the time I’ve been on Lemmy but it’s gotten so apparent in my life these last 2 holidays trying to make plans and soon New Years of the change and the the first time in more than a decade we’re all within an hour of each other but majority of them are just socially MIA to do anything outside of scrolling on the couch laughing at nonexistent people and animals in reels. What’s worked for you to help combat this within your friends without giving up on them? The best thing I’ve been able to find has been the bar style arcades and laser tag that’s helped make that similar enjoyment while out of the house.
Jesus, that’s scary. Most of my friend group doesn’t use social media.
Honestly the only thing I think you could do would be to talk to them honestly about it, and say their behavior concerns you, maybe ask them to put their phones away in your company.
Yeah I’ve talked with them about it but it’s really the dopamine being hijacked is the issue from the content. I know there’s a thing where people lose interest in “normal” when they get used to more and more wild of a thing, like porn fetishes. I’m sure there’s things that have helped reset that mental rush, like with the example about the fetishes, those said people having actual sex to reset to being more normal (don’t take literal I’m being very general since I don’t study this). I’m pretty scared of the “create your game” AI engines that will inevitably coming for this reason cause it will make exactly what your want to always want it and then hook the user to never wanting to disconnect from the game. My friends though aren’t cut out for stuff like paintball so laser tag seemed as one of those good out of norm medians that’s not physical but out of the house
It is actual addiction. It might not be as damaging as an opioid addiction but it’s still addiction. They have to recognize and acknowledge the addiction and want to change before any change can happen.
There’s a two recent Hidden Brain podcast episodes that explain how dopamine rewards turn into addiction. I highly recommend them. It will explain a lot about what’s happening to your friends—though, sounds like you have much of it figured out. I plan on reading the psychiatrist’s book.
Hidden Brain Podcast: