Why the hell do we call it “coconut water” like it’s some holy, saint-blessed hydration straight from God’s urethra? It’s juice. It comes out of a fucking fruit. If it squirted out of an orange we wouldn’t sit there pretending it’s “orange water.” But no, slap “water” on the label. It’s not magical glacier piss. It’s coconut juice. Stop jerking off the branding like it’s some enlightened nectar for smug wellness cultists.
To me, “orange water” is a pitcher of water that has some orange slices chilling in it for a bit of flavor. “Juice” is the stuff results from squeezing a fruit or vegetable to expel its liquid.