Matt said: “It was a very embarrassing accident. One of the issues with being so large, especially in hot water showers, is that it’s not exactly easy to see my feet.
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too. As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
Right, because a fifteen-inch penis is totally going to obstruct your view of both feet and everything else below your waistline, and your dick is totally the reason you clumsily slipped. And you totally aren’t looking for every possible excuse to turn any event of your life into another opportunity to brag about your massive, record-breaking schlong.
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too.As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
“I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”
I’m 100% sure you cannot get an erection if it’s that long, not enough blood in the body to supply it. You should probably get a surgery to make it smaller if you have this
Right, because a fifteen-inch penis is totally going to obstruct your view of both feet and everything else below your waistline, and your dick is totally the reason you clumsily slipped. And you totally aren’t looking for every possible excuse to turn any event of your life into another opportunity to brag about your massive, record-breaking schlong.
🙄
Sounds like he slipped on his penis
He just likes to brag & isn’t evolved enough to have a detachable penis.
What a blast from the past!
I don’t even have to clock the link, and King Missile is now playing the hits in my head. 🤘🏼
edit: leaving it, as-is
He does, however, have an enormous penis
Anyone can acquire an enormous penis & just have it on display somewhere to soothe your day.
If mine was that big, I’d probably just stare it, too.
Also Tom Segura has a bit about seeing a guy with a large penis
While I appreciate the link, I am absolutely not having that in my watch history. I really don’t want recommendations based on…whatever that is
He just described the bulge he sees and then tries to play it off like he wasn’t staring at it. He says dick a bunch, and I think 1 fuck
Oh, c’mon! Where’s your sense of adventure?
It died when my bones started to creak
Mr. Glass?
Feels like it sometimes, ngl
Old age is probably worse, but middle age sucks
Not a very obfuscating username, Mr. Jackson. 🙇🏼♂️
Yeah Tom Segura, yuck
It takes one to know one, and buddy…you’re not that guy
Thankfully, neither am I. 😅😶
That sounds suspiciously jealous 😏
I’m 100% sure you cannot get an erection if it’s that long, not enough blood in the body to supply it. You should probably get a surgery to make it smaller if you have this
Nah, you wanna blood dope
Thanks, Doc.