I know opinions on this vary a lot depending on the country and culture, so I’m curious what others think. Personally, I have a 22-year-old son. I bought him a house and a car, I pay for his university tuition (his grades are high enough for a state-subsidized spot, but we feel that should go to someone more in need), and I basically support him fully. We want him to focus on his studies and enjoy this stage of his life. He will finish his dentistry degree in 2028, and then we plan to finance the opening of his private practice. We’ll stop providing financial support once he’s earning enough to live comfortably on his own. I see many parents online (especially in North America) talking about kids moving out at 18, paying rent to live at home, and covering their own bills, and it honestly shocks me. That feels unfathomable to me. I believe that as parents, we have a duty to give our children a good life since we brought them into this world.
My parents helped through college, and then I went out on my own. The help was still available, though. In my early 30’s, I moved back in with them because I had taken a job in the town where they lived. It was supposed to be temporary, but they saw that my financial situation needed them to step in, so they offered to let me stay and pay them a small rent (basically to cover bills and food). That was a huge help! 2-years later and I was mostly debt free (only student loans and a small car loan left), and taking a new job further away from them.
Long story short, I think parents should help when they can, and if the situation warrants it. There’s something to be said for letting your kids fail on their own. They learn more than you can teach them that way. But, while it’s good to help them, it’s also important that they recognize the help they’ve received. Knowing that outside help got them where they are is a Good Thing. It helps make them more empathetic to others who maybe don’t have the same support system.
ETA: the student loans were very low interest rate, back when that was a thing.