A plastic existence
Donny, i understand you. I once bought myself a #1 dad mug at the thrift shop. i don’t even have kids.
C’mon, boomers. Lecture us about participation trophies again.
I honestly don’t know how the Onion is going to beat this.
Heck, I don’t know if future students of history are actually going to be able to believe the history books about this decade, should they be written with any sort of accuracy… Reality’s jumped the shark.
Some 30-35 years ago there was a commando of (mostly child) soldiers running around naked because it makes them invulnerable, or so their leader claimed. Then he went on forcibly apologizing to people whose family members he’d killed and/or eaten. Oh and he’s an evangelical street preacher.
Reality has never been not weird.
You forgot that he is called General Butt Naked.
Of course they will. Political leaders in the past have done many many bizarre things.
Oh, I know, but most of the time they’re remembered for only one or two things. I have no idea how the history books are going to handle the shear number of unhinged things Trump and co have done.
They’ll gloss over a lot of it just like they do with Hitler. You hear about the big things like the beer hall putsch, maybe the street fighting, the Nuremberg laws, kristalnacht, maybe the nighr of long knives, the concentration and death camps, the blitz, the attacks on western and Eastern Europe, and the seige of stalingrad. That’s a lot, so they often don’t address stuff like the bizarre structure of nazi command (it was far more about who could claim to have the ear of who than a rigid structure), the fact that Goering was an opiate addict from the time he joined the party to the time he was hanged for it, the fact that the party was super anti drug and Hitler and his wehrmacht were on meth, the fact that anti semitism basically gave the united states nukes thanks to brain drain, the insistence on spreading efforts into many super weapons rather than committing to a small number given all the resources they could possibly need, the fact that Himmler was a weird nerdy loser whose power came from being the least obviously threatening option to many party members…
Or we could go to WWI Germany, because Kaiser Wilhelm was barely discussed in my history classes other than just him being in charge and having been largely led by the actually competent Bismarck, but this guy was a weird crazy little motherfucker. And I mean that in a “this guy was attracted to his mom” way.
Ooh or you could look at the Roman Empire, the whole empire is largely glossed over with a bit about the Julians then Constantine and Justinian and the fall of the western empire. But like, a decent portion of the roman emperors were some variety of bonkers according to the history (but roman historians are much more like highly partisan propagandists than dutiful recounters of happenings).
In short, people already forget his scandals from a year ago, much less last term. Many books will be written about him, but ultimately his primary strategy is “flooding the zone” ie keep doing controversial shit that gets your name in the news so nothing is able to stick, and if it does then who cares, that means nobody’s reporting on your current bad thing. The internal crackdowns will be condensed and simplified to major turning points and the external aggression will be condensed and simplified similarly. And in that way the next fascist movement will involve the “you’re exaggerating” for years before it becomes “yeah, so what”.
The Nobel organization should rescind her award and give it to someone else. Now he just has a gold necklace and not an official Nobel Prize.
He already just has a gold necklace and not an official peace prize. Giving away the physical medal doesn’t change who was officially given the award. Just like giving away an Olympic medal doesn’t make the new holder the winner of an Olympic event
I know that. You know that. I really bet he doesn’t.
It’s like fucking Putin and the Superbowl ring.
What…? Didn’t know about this. Need to search web
Holy shit. What a piece of work…
… I had forgotten about that.
Someone gave putin a superbowl ring? Is putin an american football fan?
He stoles its from us
He was allegedly being shown the ring when he simply walked it out of the room and didn’t return
Allegedly (wasn’t there myself)
Trump discovers a new level of loserdom daily.
It means nothing because it can’t be given to anyone other than whose won it. Like you can’t give the medal of freedom to Oscar the Grouch.
We really should, though. Dude needs a win.
He helped teach the world to read, if Oscar doesn’t deserve it who does?
Is this Oscar?
No this is Patrick
I would. Oscar’s the freeest muppet, he lives by his own rules. (And his garbage can is bigger on the inside, so that includes the laws of physics)
I just crapped in my pants! Now give me an award!
🏆
🏆👨🚀🔫👨🚀
This is more pathetic than getting sports trophies off of Freecycle and claiming you “won” all of them. What a pedophile loser!
JFC, how pathetic this guy is.
That’s not how medals work, asshole.
Who would have thought a guy practically in the Silent Generation would have pined for a participation trophy? Such a loser.
Not even a participation trophy. I have recieved exactly 1 trophy in my life. It was a 1992 participation trophy for playing 1st grade basketball as mandated by the school.
But I DID play the season of basketball. I DID participste.
Show me where trump has participated in acts that promote peace.
What ending the wars in palestine, syria, lebanon, yemen, palestine again, yemen, lebanon, then iran, then palestine aren’t good enough for you?
Well do not worry he may be ending wars this year in venezuela, cuba, mexico, canada, denmark, and iran again. /s
There’s 195 countries in the world and we’re engaged in like 7 different wars so that’s 188 wars that Trump has prevented by not randomly deciding to attack them /s
Should have made a fake one with a little radioactive bit inside.
I mean who would check ?
Airport security would detect that. Radio-isotope poisoning is a favorite of the Russians, I’m sure the White house has multiple layers of detection set up for exactly that kind of thing.
I mean they would check for bugs but radioactive?
I don’t think trump uses airport security checks.
I mean, even a security theater as incompetent as the TSA would catch this kind of thing. The White House security would probably know about it before the medal even made it in the same building as trump.
I think my faith in their competency is a lot lower than yours.
But you may be right.
Unfortunately, she’s literally a fan of Trump. Not just because of the recent events either. She’s a hardline rightwinger from a rich family.
Participation award.
Say what you will about participation awards, but at least their recipients actually participated in the activity in question. I don’t know what this is.
It’s a bribe.
I theorize he is trying to get into heaven (???) and he might believe that the only thing that could cancel out all his sins is to become the Nobel Peace Prize winner (???) through violence (???)
None of this makes any sense if you don’t have severe dementia.
I don’t think it’s dementia that did that, I think it’s a very specific type of psychological abuse that results in thinking that way. I suspect it’s from his father encouraging him to be a bully, placing high expectations, and not caring enough to watch him actually earn awards, just checking that he has them. This is all in line with the childhood his niece described in her book Too Much and Never Enough.
A childhood like that could easily shape one’s understanding of achievement away from “doing the thing” to “having the rewards/symbol of having done the thing”. And if someone thinks having the trophy is more important than having won the competition I don’t see any reason they would feel the divine would think any differently. And I think even pre dementia he’d slowly drift from “I have the 2025 Nobel peace prize” to “I won the 2025 Nobel peace prize” slowly reshaping his memories until he doesn’t remember how he got it.
It is because Obama got it before. It is not that deep
Well boy howdy, do I sure hope he gets to test that hypothetical assumption real soon.
The zionist encouraging the us to install a puppet government won the peace prize.
Exactly. The prize itself is a joke even before this colossal self-own.
Participation award.Bribe
LOL for what though? He’s not gonna make her President of Vzla.
He could. There are bribes for everything in this administration. You got pardon bribes, position of power bribes, keep quiet bribes, etc, etc.
He didn’t do regime change. He took out Maduro but not the regime, he said he wasn’t going to install her cause she is not popular with the people in Vzla. She’s just kissing his ass. In a most pathetic way.
haha oh man what a loser
